Literary thoughts

 You'll have to pardon the lack of new (old?) content. I've been dealing with a lot, my creative well seems to have run dry in this summer heat, and I've been taking some time off to take care of myself because I am very bad at resting. As much as I'd love to just be able to go nonstop and be ultra-productive all the time and write fifty novels a year... humans don't work like that.

One of the things I've been doing while resting is reading (not research papers, surprisingly). There's something emotionally, mentally, and spiritually healing about the power of a story to temporarily take you to a different world, to dredge up fond feelings and nostalgic memories, to allow you to be right there looking over the characters' shoulders, sympathizing with their struggles and celebrating their successes. I've been reading a series of books set in the 1940's that I remember from when I was a kid, and it's been giving me those warm cozy nostalgia vibes. Okay, I'm not quite that old, but it reminds me of my grandparents' neighborhood, of simpler and quieter times, much like the effect of a Norman Rockwell painting.

Anyhow, I guess the whole business has got me thinking about some questionable literary advice I've heard over the years, which then of course makes me want to vent about it on my blog where I'm not actually directly debating with anyone. (I hate arguing. It's so pointless and never gets either party what they want and all you end up with is hurt feelings. I think it's much more sensible to just present your opinion and leave it for people to think about.)

I've been pondering children's literature, and especially about the lowbrow sort of nonsense that sometimes passes for children's fiction these days. Not too long ago I was over at a house where one of the young sons came up to me with a book he'd been reading and told me he didn't like that there was gross humor in it. I heartily agreed with him and told him I was sure he could write something better. I think I just confused him, because he gave me a noncommittal response and walked away. Looking back, I wish I would have expressed to him that if something he's reading makes him uncomfortable, he doesn't have to keep reading it.

What really gets my goat is when people claim this type of literature (if one can even call it that) is acceptable because at least it's getting kids to read. Under that same logic, we should feed babies Twinkies and Red Vines because at least it's getting them to eat solid food. Junk is junk, no matter your justification for it.

In addition, letting kids read whatever they want with no adult supervision does not help them learn how to be judicious in their media choices (or in anything else, really). If you don't put your foot down and say "no" to your child reading a trashy book, how much more difficult will it be when they're a teenager wanting to do things that are far more serious? 

Kids aren't born knowing how to stay away from things that aren't good for them (and nowhere is this better evidenced than my terrifying stunt artist of a 2-year-old niece). They rely on the adults in their lives to teach them that. And they also need to be taught that their mental well-being is just as important as their physical safety. Part of me wonders if the mental health issues that so many kids and teens struggle with nowadays are partly due to their parents not adequately monitoring what their kids put into their brains. 

Many kids around the world physically have it better than at any other time in history, but we adults have an obligation to them to address the mental and emotional harm being done to them by social media, too much screen time, and questionable entertainment. Anyone who tells you that the latter has no negative effect on children is straight up lying. The media exerts an influence on our children that is as powerful as it is insidiously intangible.

Some people may claim that it doesn't matter what kids read or watch as long as their parents are teaching them proper values, but that's simply not true. First off, that assumes that children will always trust their parents more than they trust the media, which is not a reliable assumption. Children fall into the trap of "if it's on TV or the Internet then it must be true" even more easily than adults do. They view their favorite characters as beloved authority figures, especially because those characters are aesthetically appealing, come with catchy music and an inexhaustible supply of merchandise, and never say no to the audience--unlike their parents.

So when Queen Elsa prances around in her sparkly dress and belts out a power ballad about not accepting any responsibility, or Moana argues with her overstressed widower dad and runs away from home to prove she's right (as teenagers always are, clearly), should it come to any surprise to parents when their toddler throws a tantrum about taking their dishes to the sink?*

All children reach a point in their development when they realize that Mom and Dad might not always be right about everything. They start learning to make their own judgment calls and do their own critical thinking. And that's as it should be. But it's a grave mistake to overexpose kids to media that sends messages that are just plain incorrect and don't help them become psychologically healthy adults. No matter how many times you tell them "now remember that's not true", it's still sinking into their little brains and will manifest at the worst moment.

And secondly, if a book or a movie carries a message you disagree with, why have you let it into your home in the first place? Why are you teaching your children one way while accepting media that teaches something else? It's like telling your kids to eat healthy but then buying them junk food. You're doing the same thing when you enforce certain standards in your home but let them check out iffy books at the library.

So we're clear, I'm not talking about teaching your kids to be open-minded and be tolerant and respectful of others' views, opinions, and beliefs. I believe there's a lot we all can learn from each other when we're being our best selves. I'm talking here about values that are just good plain common sense for every sane individual. If you don't want your kid spouting off gross humor at the dinner table and ruining your appetite and making your in-laws uncomfortable, teach them that gross humor is unacceptable by disallowing it.

What we put into our brains affects us, young and not-so-young alike. I firmly believe in the importance of monitoring our media and placing priority on choosing things to read, watch, listen to, and play that make us feel better about life, that reinforce those values that our conscience and inner voice are telling us are true, and that we can feel good about sharing with the kids in our lives.

Another piece of advice that got stuck in my craw (don't you just love weird old idioms?) is the idea that writers should read books they enjoy to analyze what they enjoy about them and how those elements could improve their own writing, but also intentionally read books they dislike to analyze what they dislike about them for the same reason. Now, I have no qualms with the first part of that idea. But why in the world would you want to purposely make yourself read something you dislike?

I don't care what your intellectual justification is--if you're having a negative gut reaction to something you're reading, your brain is telling you it doesn't want any more. It's the mental equivalent of standing in the middle of the street and letting cars run you over so you can analyze what you don't like about getting hit by a car. Some things are better off not learned by experience.

At any rate, we've all unintentionally read things we dislike. Whether it was a depressing "classic novel" for school, a bad buy at a used bookstore, or an underwhelming bestseller, by the time you reach adulthood you will definitely have had at least one experience reading something you never want to read again, and you will have developed a pretty good feel for what you don't like in a book.

Every author strives to improve their craft, but you are a human being, not an AI deep-learning algorithm. Purposely reading books that are irritating, upsetting, or depressing may teach you something about what you don't want to do in your own writing, but it will also definitely give you the mental equivalent of indigestion--or even food poisoning. In my opinion, it's not worth it. Again, I think we all owe it to ourselves to be mindful about what we put into our brains. And take any writing advice we find on the Internet with a huge grain of salt.

*If you can't tell, I hated those two movies. Moana robbed me of all interest in future Disney offerings. Which is a shame because I attended college in Hawaii and I love the Pacific Islander peoples and their cultures, and a fantasy adventure based on Polynesian history and mythology is a wonderful idea, but I felt like the writing and character development were all wrong. And I also hate stories about rebellious teenagers who turn out to be right because in real life, teenagers know better than their parents about 0.01% of the time. I was also not a rebellious teenager so I can't relate at all.